I love making muscles but yesterday I ripped the lining of yet another one of my jackets to bits.
It’s orange and it’s soft & it’s not sold anywhere anymore… and I can’t just go shopping for something new because I don’t enjoy shopping.
I usually buy stuff online that I’ve seen in catalogues/Instagram/blogs. Or I see something in a shop window. I rarely “go shopping”. And when I do it’s guaranteed that I don’t find anything.
So I can’t just shrug off this latest wardrobe casualty & go shopping.
But what’s the alternative?
It’s to lose some insulation from around my guns.
Now there’s a problem with that option too. Namely – I like to eat.
I have thought about a million ways I could lean out a bit and be able to wear half of my wardrobe again – intermittent fasting, no snacking, not eating after dinner, not eating after 7pm and so on but I can’t get around the fact that I like to eat. I don’t want to get into the mindset of depriving myself. Monday to Friday I eat very clean most of the time, no gluten/sugar/dairy, but I eat a decent quantity of all the good stuff.
On weekends I am a
bit lot more relaxed about my eating but I don’t ever just totally binge on junk food. There are certain foods I just would never eat. Coke or Domino’s pizza or Galaxy chocolate, for example.
I might, I just might eat one of these though (I haven’t yet so I can’t tell you if they are absolutely glorious or absolutely revolting).
And I definitely have a Wahaca feast every other weekend. And I definitely have some chocolate. And maybe some caramel pop corn. And cheese. And wine.
By Monday I’m usually ready for my green veg and protein diet again as my digestion, as written many times before, is a diva and hates anything gluteny, sugary, milky. I swear in my 20s my body wasn’t so sensitive to these things. But then again, in my 20s I wasn’t so sensitive to a lot of other things as well – alcohol, not sleeping, my own hormones, painful shoes, shitty weather, idiots…
So what’s a buff food-loving/shopping-hating girl to do when jackets and shirts don’t fit anymore?
I have no answer right now.
Other than just get through to the summer when I can wear dresses and cardigans, and jackets are no longer required.
And maybe I could try to just eat a little bit less. Just a little bit.